OK here is my issue.
After my first marriage fell apart I had my tubes "tied" or "clamped". I was in a weird spot in my life and the doctor I had was quick to listen to me. DUH. I was a single mother of 2 and like I said in a weird spot.
2 years after that marriage ended I found the love of my life. He has 2 wonderful children as well, so that's a total of 4 in our home. But there is this NEED for one of OUR own. We talk about it all the time. And all my girlfriends have had babies in the past year. I find it really hard to be happy for them. I know I shouldn't be that way. I don't let a day go by without thinking about it. He is such a wonderful father and man. I've done alot of research on getting my tubes reversed, but it's so expensive and we aren't married yet. So it's a wating game for me. I make comments to him and he makes comments like "well that's after we get you untied and have a baby". It just shoves the knife deeper. I should be patient uhh. :hugplease
Anyone know what I'm goin through?

:hugs

i dont really have any advice, but if you need an ear, feel free to message me:)

I'm sorry hun! Is he saying that he'll marry you after the two of you have a baby? I feel you on the whole watching everyone around you having them and it making you want you're own (or more in your case). It's hard, but you just have to go on...how? I'm still trying to figure that out. In the meantime, you should enjoy the children you have!! :hugs

I'm sorry you're feeling badly =(

I don't have a permanant form of birth control I have an IUD but I sort of know how you are feeling. After my son was born I didn't want any more children well at least not with my ex-husband so I got a 5 yr IUD. Well now yrs later I'm engaged to the most wonderful guy and he's a fantastic father. He has 2 biological children and one step-child and I have 2 children as well so there are 5 of them. I really want another child and I think about it constantly. It seems like everyone I know has a newborn. Right now we are still debating the issue. I want one and he's not sure. I love him and I will marry him regardless but part of me would love to have a child with him. If it ever happens it will still be a few years down the road though.

That has always been one of my worst fears. Even though we are having our forth child and I am SOOOOO done with having babies, my doctors do constantly remind me of how permanent it is. They've said all kinds of things like "What if, God forbid, something happens to one of your children? Or all of your children? or your husband?" and they have a good point. Just b/c I feel done now, that doesn't mean that this feeling is permanent. So, I keep having doubts in my mind about having it done also. I haven't researched it enough to know exactly how much it costs but I'm sure it's a lot if it's not covered under insurance. I'm sorry you're going through this, I can totally understand how you're feeling and there is NOTHING wrong with wanting a baby with your love. (L)

Thanks everyone!!!! I'm having another teary day about it today too. I think it's worst right before my period, when all my hormones are say BABY!!!! And my children remind me everyday that I'm blessed to be a mom. I just wanted to share one or more with my love, like Brandi said. It would still be a couple of years off and it's not completely out of the picture. He really does want to get it done as soon as we get married. I actually have an aunt that had her tubes reversed after 21 years to have a baby with her new husband(crazy if you ask me). So I know it can be done. I just wished I hadn't done it in the first place. It's too permanent. And I only had it done 1 1/2 years ago. If or I should say WHEN I get reversed I won't get retied. It changed me too much. I'm just not a young chicken,lol, and my clock is ticking VERY loudly in my head!! I think we've just planted a seed and I tend to get impatient when I want something. I shouldn't let it get me down.

I so know how you feel. When I had my tubes tied the first, I was VERY adament that we were done. Our ODS was going through cancer treatment at the time as well, and my response to the "god forbid what if something happens to your son" it didnt change the fact that we were done. Then that tubal failed. And our 4th child was born at 25 weeks and didnt make it. When she was born, they removed ALL of my tubes.

I kick myself in the ass EVERYDAY now. While we know that another child wont replace her, we just dont feel like we are done. But with them having removed all of my tubes, our ONLY choice to have another is IVF. We are saving up for it, but even going through a military hosp it's still a pretty penny.

If you ever want to talk, PM me. I am not on here a lot, but when I get a PM it notifies me by email so I will know.

:hugs